Category Archives: Smashwords

Happy Birthday to me!


After a fabulous weekend that started off Friday walking around Kings Island, on the hottest day of the summer and riding roller coasters till my brain was scrambled, the wife and I took off yesterday and did absolutely nothing. (I didn’t even write or edit – I am bad.)

Yet I am trying, as a writer and an old man, 54 today, I tried to figure out the attraction of getting locked in a metal box and having your body strapped down into your seat so tightly you couldn’t breathe and then being shot down this winding course as fast as 80 mph. The first one we hit was the Diamondback. This ride starts off slowly, climbing a 215 foot hill. When you get to the top of the hill it is straight down. Well the web site says 75 degrees, my heart said straight down.  With twists and turns so abrupt I think my soul left my body a few times. One of the interesting things about this one, they actually have a camera somewhere along the track that takes your picture. Everyone of me is holding on for life screaming as loud as I can. We rode this one 3 times. When we first got there at noon I noticed this little guy around 50 wearing a t-shirt that said, “Diamondback rides 5,400 and counting.” We left at 7pm, our last ride on the Diamondback and he was still doing it.

The Firehawk was a fun one also, first you sit down and right before the ride takes off your seat is reclined so you are lying straight on your backs. Then it takes off, gaining speeds of up to 55 mph. At first I didn’t think this was too bad, until we were flipped over and staring at the ground as you flew by at least 10 feet above it. Makes you really think about your live as you see it flashing before your eyes.

The Vortex wasn’t as bad as it looks from the ground, with all the loops and corkscrews all you feel is the speed and if you keep your eyes glued to the back of the seat in front of you, the loops and other things are not even noticeable.

Fight Deck was cool, after a ten minute walk from the entrance to the ride itself which only lasted about one minute and thirty seconds; we were suspended over tree tops traveling at 55 mph. It had to be the smoothest ride I was on.

Flight of Fear was in inside ride, ahh…air conditioning! You feel like you are shot out of a canon and travel 0 to 54 mph in just four seconds. Twists turns and loops and corkscrews are less scary because all you see is darkness and a few flashes of light. Strobe lights and darkness and speed, can we say seizure?

Riding those convinced me that the reason we love rollercoasters so much is because we need the danger, the adrenaline of doing something that is life threatening. It’s all in the mind.

Between the hard core coasters we relaxed a little doing Adventure Express, Backlot Stunt Coaster and Boo Blasters On Boo Hill. They were all inside, little and air conditioned. Delirium and Invertigo were shut down. For a few seconds, we stood and watched as a couple took to the air in Slingshot. On the third bounce we looked at each other and said, “Nope.”

And of course we rode The Racer, it hasn’t changed much in 20 years except the seats got smaller.

Once I got my wife to the top of the Eiffel Tower, which was difficult because she is afraid of heights, and we took a few pictures. We even got our caricatures done by her daughter.

Brian

Tera

And she got me the coolest t-shirt, Airbrushed. I May wear this one out.

Add to this the shameless self-promotion I am doing to today, I hope this is going to be a good month.

From now until September 10, 2011 both of my books are free if you grab them from Smashwords.

Journey of Tara, which is normally 99 cents, is free with the coupon code MZ72A.

The Set’la, which is normally $2.99, is free with the coupon code ZR48R.

A word of warning, the Set’la needs a little editing and other fixes. I am trying to get my editor to read it, but she is stalling. I hope that isn’t a bad sign.

Everyone have a great week and a fantastic Labor day.

Cylon

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March Madness and more


The door opens, creaking from rusted hinges and echoing through the empty blog. I stick my head out – waving shyly.

It’s been a few days since I made an appearance in here, but I will try to catch up.  

My books, Journey of Tara and The Set’la are now available on Barnes and Noble and Smashwords. (I did a search on Amazon for them, but couldn’t find them listed.) They are both in desperate need of reviews so please let me know how you like them. I have had very favorable comments on both of them so I am doing a March Madness sale.

Only on Smashwords until the 15th of March, you can get Journey of Tara {use coupon code HH39D} and The Set’la {use coupon code QT34P} for the low, low price of a click. That would be FREE! Yeah, I don’t care about making money, I just love to write. I just don’t do it as much as I should.

All I do ask is that you leave a review once you have a chance to read it.

Trying to desperately fall asleep to Criminal Minds, the repeats on A & E I thought of a sequel to Journey of Tara and I honestly thought of getting up, kicking my stepson off my computer, so I could start it. As I look back, I should have done just that – because I have since forgotten. The wife was sound asleep anyway and I didn’t want to wake her up by moving.

I think I’ll be spending the day in Azeroth trying to remember it.

I recently received a copy of King Solomons Journey by Sammy Sutton I am greatly enjoying it so far. Thanks Sammy.

Recently I finished The Yaakmen of Tyrie by Mark Paul Jacobs. I gave it five stars. Here is my review:

In the northern most continent of a strange alien world live a group of humans. As they battle to survive during a rough winter that only seems to be getting tougher as time goes on, they discover clues to their past, clues pointing southward into a strange new territory. Quintar is a high ranking Yaakrider, Yaaks are huge beasts that seem to form an affinity with their riders, is thrust into politics unwillingly and after a winter of fighting against terrifying snow beasts begins a journey southward through uncharted territory filled with magnificent wonders, treacherous dangers, snobbish warlords and new technology, all to discover a lost secret about their unknown past.

In The Yaakman of Tyrie Mark Paul Jacobs has invented a fresh new world and a culture with very believable characters, intriguing subplots and a mystery that will have you guessing till the end. I would recommend this book to you if you enjoy science fiction adventures on strange new worlds

That’s it for me today – maybe.

Question, do you think that is too many hyperlinks? I like doing those.

The Set’la Chapter 2


Hello all, hope every one is having a great Friday.

My newest book, The Set’la is at Smashwords ready to buy. Please take this operratunity and check it out.

A few months ago I put a little bit of chapter one in here,  Out on a Limb, so this week, chapter two was calling for attention. So here we are.

The Set’la Chapter two.

Dani quickly looked up as large shadows blotted out the suns. She had seen the birds in the distance, yet like everything else in this place they weren’t what she expected. They were flying, they had wings, but they were women. Humanoid women.

She would have taken a closer look, but one of the cats was running right for her. As she braced herself to jump out of its way, a stone tipped spear entered the creatures head, knocking it to the ground and exiting through the jaw. All around her, the cats fell at the spears of the flying women.

She finally took a moment to look at her saviors. The wings of all thirteen bird-women ranged in color from gold to a deep blue, with eyes and hair to match. A dried skin, similar to the dead cats scattered around the field, covered their breasts and hips like a bikini on a Florida beach. From spending years out in the suns, their skin had turned a dark golden tan. Glancing down she noticed the few weapons strapped around their waist. The most overwhelming thing about them was their height. The one in front of her was at least ten feet tall and, by her standards, as thin as a rail. The legs were long and bony with the feet being the only parts that didn’t look human. They were prehensile and flat. She supposed that was so they could hold onto things better while they were in flight.

By now, all thirteen Bird-Women surrounded Dani and began whispering in a strange unknown tongue. Her savoir approached her first, the only one with the gold wings, coming toward her cautiously with her arms outstretched. She touched Dani’s shoulder, as if to move her. It felt like she wanted to turn her around. A little concerned, but not wanting to provoke an attack from these women, Dani turned around in a circle until she faced the gold one again.

Everyone seemed to be staring at her, trying to see her back. ‘Perplexed because of my lack of wings,’ she thought. The gold one said a few words that Dani didn’t understand and the other bird-women broke up and began making ropes out of the tall grasses. That’s when she noticed the tails. Beginning at the base of their spine, the tails were about three feet long, hairless, and smooth; they ended with a rounded tip about an inch thick and were constantly moving, yet never touched the ground.

Dani was watching what they were doing, until she noticed her savoir was still staring at her and talking.

“I’m sorry, I don’t understand.” She said as she shook her head.

The gold winged one looked at her quizzically and pointed to herself, “Cathelayna…. Cathelayna. Mog Cathelayna.”

Dani was familiar with those old movies where people came upon someone that didn’t speak their language and introduce themselves. She had always thought they were stupid the way they did that. But hey! If it worked. She pointed to herself and said “Dani.”

The Bird-Woman repeated after her, “Dani.”

“Well shit! It does work. Oh, Dani.” she pointed to herself and then said, “Cathelayna.” pointing to her new friend. She could tell by the large grin on her face that she did it right.

Once the other women finished with the ropes, they began tying up their kill. She spotted a few of them spreading their wings as they leaped into the air. They were beautiful in flight and soared around in a circle at first. A flap of skin on the tail expanded and helped control their course, acting like the rudder of an airplane. Two of them would swoop down, each grabbing one end of their kill, to carry the heavy load between them. After they all got off the ground, Cathelayna motioned for her to follow and leaped into the air.

“God, I’m surrounded by blondes. Hey. I can’t fly!” Dani said as she pointed to her wingless back. At about that time Cathelayna circled around and dived towards her, legs and prehensile feet outstretched.-

This is only part of the chapter, since the entire chapter is over 5000 words. Look for more in the weeks to come, or buy it. At the moment, until Sunday night, there is a coupon code: UK77U, that you can use for a free copy.

I hope you enjoy the read and if you like it, please leave a review, I love reviews!

Oh yeah, the link for the book: The Set’la

 

 

 

The attack of the Edit headache


As some of you may know, I published a new story on smashwords a couple of weeks ago called The Set’la. After waiting only a few days I received notice that my hyperlinks were not behaving the way should and my paragraphs were not properly aligned.
I didn’t have this problem last time and it seems as if I did everything correctly except for a few capitalized words. That one was an easy fix. Looking through my document I figured this would be a real easy fix.
It took me only a few minutes to fix the hyperlinks and then I began paragraph adjustment procedures. I made the change needed, and then saved it and closed it. No biggy, fixed and ready to go out again. But a little voice whispered in my head, “You sure you don’t want to check.it?” In my mind I saw Gollum staring at me rubbing his hands together as he licked his cracked lips.
Giving into the fish smelling voice, I clicked on the open office program and waited for it patiently…


Once it was up and running I checked the formatting and it held. “There you go smelly voice! It worked!
Before it could change back I quickly uploaded it…..
….
….
….
…and got the message, “This is wrong idiot, try it again.”

I heard the evil laughter echoing through my head as I fixed it again, saved it and closed it one more time. When I opened it back up the changes were not saved. I realized that the last book I sent to Smashwords was on the actual Microsoft Word, not the barebones version in OpenOffice.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I like the fact that Openoffice is free, even with all the problems I have had with it over the years. To be honest the only reason I was using it is because it was free and I was rebelling against Bill Gates Corporate Opulence. Why should I pay extra for a program that always came with the computer only a few years ago,…off track,..sorry.

Anyway, after an hour of internet searches and queries sent out over cyberspace I tried one more little trick.

I copied and pasted it into a brand new notepad and then saved it. Here is where I messed up. I don’t know how I did it but when I opened it back up in an OpenOffice Doc it had Chinese Characters almost every sentence. I cursed so much that the wife thought her daughter was home and suddenly developed a very deep voice.

Okay, I thought to myself, I can fix this. I copied and pasted the unwanted symbols into the ‘FIND AND REPLACE’ function and hit the replace all button.
Now, every apostrophe and quotation mark has been replaced with a question mark.
After two hours of trying to figure this out I gave into Mr. Gates and bought Microsoft Word.
The paragraphs behaved, but the question marks were still there and now I have to reedit, rework, redo. It will be back up. I can fix this, make it stronger, faster, better than it was before.
Hopefully by the end of January.
Wish me luck.